Which Child Care Solution is Right for You?
Bug-eyed about returning to work? Hear from real moms who have re-entered the workforce and found ways to cope.
Child care will most likely be the biggest decision you face when returning to work. There are many factors to consider, but the most important will be finding someone you trust so you can set your worries aside and be productive while you're at work.
If you're returning to work and beginning to consider new child care options, there are a few places you can turn to start your search. Let's explore the options.
CHILD CARE OPTIONS
Relatives
Asking a family member to care for your baby can seem convenient, but really take care to examine this option before you enter into it. Unless you and your mom or mother-in-law get along really, really well, it's not the best idea. Free child care is wonderful (heck, free anything is exciting), but the downside is that the person you rely on is ultimately doing you a favor and, in the spirit of "I'll scratch your back, you scratch mine," can also end up regaling you with endless tales about gall-bladder surgery. Riveting.
Many parents also feel less able to speak up about issues such as discipline and proper care when they feel like they "owe" their caregiver. If you do use a family member for child care, make sure to test things out for a brief period to see what the relationship will be like. If you find that things get stressful, you'll still have a chance to transition gracefully to a daycare or babysitter without the added stress of a time crunch before your first day back on the job.
Babysitters and Nannies
Most parents find a babysitter or nanny to be the best option for their baby - not only does this option offer the most flexibility for your schedule, but the baby is kept in your own home with the 100% focused attention of a caregiver.
Sandra Crawford-Williamson, new mom and COO of True.com, one of the nation's top three dating websites, says she "worries about appropriate child care every minute of every day," but having an at-home nanny is the best solution to minimize her concern. "After checking out our child care options," Sandra said, "we decided we would really prefer the one-on-one care an at-home nanny could provide. [The nanny] doesn't like hearing Jenna cry, so I know she'll be attentive to her needs." A nanny can also be surprisingly affordable, especially if you have more than one child. And in-home caregivers are easy to find! Sites like Sittercity allow parents to tap into instant care networks all over the U.S.
Day Cares
Day care is a convenient and popular form of child care for mothers returning to work. Be aware, though, that day cares operate on a strict schedule, so know that they will only be able to cover you during regular business hours. There are a number of ways you can feel most comfortable about the day care center you choose:
- Shop around. Cost is a factor and can vary greatly from place to place, but also heavily weigh the quality of their caregivers. Ask questions. Do the caregivers have education in early childhood? What's their experience in a day care facility?
- Once you've narrowed down your list, spend time at the centers. Take your baby for an afternoon to mingle with the other babies. Engage in conversations with the caregivers.
- Talk to other parents about their satisfaction with the center. Time your visit between 5 and 6 o'clock, when most parents are picking up their children. Parents are usually more than happy to share their approvals and grievances with you. After all, they've been in your shoes.
- Have an on-call sitter you can use in times of need when the day care center is closed. Sittercity's database also has sitters that are available at short notice on nights and weekends.
Cristy Bain, a CPA, chose to enroll her newborn in daycare. "My options involved sending my daughter to local church daycare or keeping her at home with a nanny," she said. "I chose to go with daycare because of the significant difference in the cost of getting a nanny at home. Now my daughter is old enough to attend a preschool and she gets the opportunity to interact with other children her age which helps her social development."
Corporate Care
Depending on where you work, your company might have a solution for you! Day cares can be integrated directly into companies, and backup care solutions as well as resource and referral agencies can help you find care. Sittercity's Corporate Program, for example, is a total life solution for parents at work. Talk to your HR department to figure out which options they have available to you.
WHICH OPTION SHOULD I CHOOSE?
Remember that a happy parent is a good parent. Choose the option that's not just good for your baby, but good for you and your family as well. Parents make different choices.
In-Home Care. As COO, Sandra wanted to keep her career on track, so she chose in-home care. "It's difficult for many moms to get back into the workplace after staying home for an extended period. Plus, it's great to be able to maintain the financial lifestyle we've grown accustomed to. I stayed at home with Jenna for 13 weeks and I loved every second of it, but I was beginning to go a bit stir crazy."
Working From Home. A growing segment of moms are also choosing to work at home after kids. Amy Heard, an elementary school teacher in Texas, decided not to go back to work, but to operate a small business from home that would give her both time with her new baby and the opportunity to further her career. "Working from home was the perfect balance for me. I could spend three or four full days a week with Madelyn and while I worked the rest of the week, the time was flexible. I could schedule meetings and paperwork around her naps, meal times and play groups. I had a few reliable sitters that I called on when I needed to adhere to a client's schedule or focus on a full day's work."
Day Care. Some moms choosing the day care route find a perfect fit. As a CPA, Cristy is often very busy working late hours and trusts the day care center to fulfill her expectations. "Don't be afraid to ask questions and to tell your sitters or daycare workers what you expect from them," she said. "After all, you are paying them a great deal of money. Don't be afraid to pop in unexpectedly - this shows how much you love and value your children."
TIPS IN SELECTING CHILD CARE
Start Searching Early
It is never too early to start investigating child care options. Don't wait until the last minute when you may end up settling for an option that's not right for you and your family. "I wish I had started the nanny process a lot sooner," Sandra said. "We were in super crunch-time, panic mode. I stayed at home with my baby for 13 weeks and when I decided to return to work, we still hadn't worked out a situation we were comfortable with. For the first three weeks after my return, we relied on family and friends to care for Jenna. Finally we found a fantastic nanny with ten years of experience, but it would have been great to have her sooner. Start looking while you're expecting. Find a nanny, make a contract and have it all set."
Start Small
Initially, leave your baby with the nanny or sitter for small increments of time. This will give them time to bond with one another and the baby will begin to understand that although you are leaving, you will be back. "At first I would have my sitter come over for 15 or 20 minutes at a time; just long enough to have a shower or run to the pharmacy," Amy said. "Madelyn got used to her and that way it wasn't such a big deal when I left for a few hours or even a full day." Depending upon the flexibility of your employer, working half or shorter days can make the transition easier for you and your baby. Sandra found it best to work half days to ease back into working. "I also planned my return just before Thanksgiving so I could work for a couple of weeks, then have some time off with the baby just to make sure things were going along smoothly."
Expect a Broad Range of Emotions
Expect a broad range of emotions when returning to work for the first time. Leaving a crying baby for the first time is usually heartbreaking. But don't worry, once you're out the door and on your way, the baby will calm down and have a pleasant day. Remember that babies are intuitive and will feed off your emotions. Don't tense up or your baby will too. It will take time to get used to the idea that someone else can properly care for your child. Try to enjoy your time back at work among colleagues and friends. Remember that you're not just a new mom; you're a mom who also wants and deserves a vibrant career!
